When to Say No
The new boyfriend, D, is amazing. He’s sweet and nice, and adorable. And, he tries to respect my boundaries. He doesn’t push for anything when I say to stop. The only problem is that I’ve been vague on what’s ok and what isn’t.
I said at first just kissing for awhile, but that’s only lead to other things. We haven’t gone that far, and I don’t plan to go any further than we have already. There are some things that we’ve done, however, that I feel are too far this early.
So dow do I tell him how far is too far, when I’m not even sure. I really don’t want to rush anything or go to far.
I already told him no sex. It’s weird for me this time, though, because I’m the more experienced one. So part of the time I feel bad for not letting him do things that someone else got to to do. But really I just don’t want to make the same mistakes with D. that I’ve made with others.
I don’t know where my line is, though. How is he supposed to know when to stop, when I don’t even know when I want him to?
-Stupid Girl.
[13 days and counting]
Happy Again Today
I haven’t been happy this many days in a row in a long time. I feel so great. There’s still a little bit of drama, but it’s not much.
Last night I made a new friend. I made friends with a girl that I thought hated me; she thought I hated her too. She texted D. though and asked him to ask me if I would go over there to talk to her, but I had his phone so I texted her back. I went and talked to her, and it turns out it was all a big misunderstanding. The problems we’d had with eachother, was because of people telling us both lies, trying to make us hate eachother. But, we’re friends now.
On another note, D. and I are together. 
It’s great. I really like him alot, and he’s really sweet. It feels weird having his class ring on a chain around my neck. I’m so used to the other necklace I’d been wearing for so long, but last night Brandon got that necklace back.
12 days and counting…
11 Days
…and counting.
It doesn’t sound like a long time, but it feels like I’ve overcome a huge milestone.
11 days clean and sober…I’m doing it for real this time.
Stupid girl isn’t quite as stupid anymore.
